Social Skills

Misplaced Your Mojo?

 woman sml

Talk to Yvette about Revitalizing Your Life.

Click below to book your free consultation.

 

Organized for Life eBook


Free Yourself from Mental and Physical Clutter.

Take Control of Your Home, Your Time and Your Life.

 

US $24.95 Instant Download

Duck leadingThis article is a tad self-indulgent. I’m letting myself get away with it. I have a feeling many women (ok, maybe men too) will relate.


Leadership is a word I’ve shied away from ever since I can remember. Even as far back as primary school, when asked to collaborate with fellow students on a project, I hated it. I intuitively knew that someone had to take charge in order to get the job done, and I was willing to have a go, but my personality was definitely not suited to asserting myself, so I would tend to withdraw, sit back and let things unfold however they would.


When I worked in the corporate world, I soon learned to connect expressing ideas for innovation or improved efficiency with pain and discomfort, and just stopped bothering. I would quietly brood and feel frustrated at what seemed to me to be an illogical way of operating unfold at the whim of egos and who had the most dominant personality. I saw my suggestions in meetings (when asked for them, by the way), ridiculed, and then implemented later by male managers. Don’t even get me started!


As recently as my coaching training, this pattern was still showing up. I got bogged down on technicalities, I was a “yeah but”, a mismatcher, a “what if”. I often felt I was the exception, I was different, and that I didn’t fit in. As I feared, every time we had to get into groups, my heart sank! It all worked out though, and was exactly what I needed to face this thing and tug away at some of the threads which were holding this limiting belief together. One group I was in, in a public speaking training which was particularly challenging, gave me a beautiful feeling of empathy and contribution with my group. At another time in the same training, I actually hid in the toilet!

iStock 000070651769 SmallOk, we’ve all done it, I’ve done it, I’m not claiming to be morally superior in this department, and basically that’s what I want to write about today.


Facebook, TV, YouTube and conversations are the likely places to find a bit of moral outrage. If you’re really in the mood to be pissed off about something, you have plenty to choose from, whenever you like. Somebody is always objecting to something and we’re all invited to join in expressing how terrible and awful it is. Animal cruelty, environmental destruction, racism, domestic violence, economic genocide, corruption, bullying, unfair legal systems, sexual abuse, misogyny, poverty, you name it.


Maintream TV current affairs programmes are a classic. Recently we’ve had a whole series of reports telling us to be outraged about “hoons”, basically people doing burnouts on public roads for fun. We get the dodgy builder ones, dole bludgers are ripping off your tax dollars, all that kind of thing. Meanwhile, people all over the world are being bombed, starved, tortured, enslaved, raped and so on, the planet is being destroyed, and there’s barely a peep about it.


Whatever your views on these particular kinds of stories, what I can’t get past is where they fit into the overall scheme of things. We’re more interested in the latest celebrity scandal than we are about blatant injustice on a global level.

iStock 000007830134SmallBad stuff happens in the world – it’s going on right now.  At this moment, people are suffering, animals are suffering, and our planet is suffering. 

Mild swearing warning, but I will not be talking about any details of any distressing news.

If there was no bad news reported and no sad tales told, we could be living in ignorance of the consequences of our actions.  We could be missing out on opportunities to make a difference, to learn, to grow, to contribute.

Yes, our actions, not their actions.  I’m looking at this as us all, as a whole species, being responsible collectively for the conditions we’re living in and how we’re functioning.  But more on that in the next article.

So I guess I accept that bad news needs to be shared.

What interests me is how and why it’s shared and the intention behind each instance, and how we can use our discretion to influence the way our society deals with bad news and how we respond to it.

I saw a very cool documentary a while ago, interviewing hard core journalists about their experiences and thoughts about some of the horrendous things they had reported on.  The journalists interviewed were genuinely searching and bearing their souls looking for answers, often answers that could not ever be found, about where to draw the line, about what people needed to know and was beneficial to know, and what was going too far.  It really got me thinking.

I’m for freedom of speech.  I’m opposed to censorship (I think – I have some grey areas, I suppose like most people).  I believe in the truth being available to everyone.  I admire whistleblowers, outspoken writers and journalists, free thinkers.

I don’t admire exploitative journalism, un-necessary invasion of privacy, inaccurate or unchecked information and shallow sensationalism.

Group of friends sharing a casual meal outdoorsIt's that time of year again, when we tend to have an increased number of get togethers as we head towards the end of the year. 

As you catch up with family and friends over the coming weeks, it's a good opportunity to notice little details for future reference.  Things like food, drink, music and reading preferences, so you're able to keep these things in mind for future gift giving. 

It's also just a great opportunity to develop your listening skills and see how much better you can get to know people by paying attention to what they're saying.  Actively listening is a great way to make yourself feel more comfortable and confident in social situations, and to take the focus off yourself. 

Testimonials


"I am grateful to Yvette for the changes that she has facilitated in me. I feel that my learning from Yvette will stay with me for the rest of my life, and has brought me to a brighter, positive more confident and happy place in my family and work life."

Anshula Ohri, Toronto,
Canada

"Before I met Yvette I had many opportunities in front of me but I was feeling overwhelmed and I had no confidence in making the decisions.  I was feeling stuck and confusedd.  My career has progressed in a positive direction and I am now functioning better in physical and emotional health.  Thank you Yvette for your help.  This was one of the best decisions I have ever made."

 

Sarah Grudzien,
Melbourne, Australia

"The coaching with Yvette was very beneficial. In just a few weeks I had achieved so much. I am so thankful. I found Yvette to be very patient, professional and reassuring. I would definately recommend NLP now that I have seen the difference it has made to my life. I have left the past in the past and I am happier within myself."

Gemma,
Western Australia

"Your belief in me gave me the confidence to work out ways of improvement, knowing how important it is that these answers be found by me within me to enable them to be so powerful and successful. I loved the CD you sent as your voice is so easy to listen to and reassuring as it imparts great words of wisdom and strengthens the concepts taught within your life coaching sessions. These life skills are amazing!"

Lynne from Lowood,
Queensland, Australia

"I consider myself very fortunate having chosen Yvette for coaching.  It has turned out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made. I started from a place where I was stuck in procrastination and everything seemed so overwhelming that I didn't really know where to start.  I love the freedom and empowerment I now feel.  Yvette's methods are personalised and very effective.  I have looked forward to every coaching sesssion."

Heather
Melbourne, Australia

"Yvette is a great coach who inspires you to overcome the obstacles that she finds in working with you.  She is highly motivated and has worked hard to increase her knowledge in many areas that in turn help her clients.  Yvette draws on her own real life experience adn studies to help those of us who have to juggle many responsibilities and mangage the conflicts in thinking that come from that.  I am looking forward to working with Yvette again in the near future"

Liz Jarvis, CSI Business Solutions, 
NSW, Australia

"Through my coaching experience with Yvette I was able to shift my awareness onto my value system as opposed to staring at my circumstances each day and feeling pulled in a hole.  It's powerful because I want meaning, I want to live up to my values and what's right and good for me!  So, I truly learned the value of letting go and receiving the abundance of knowledge for every situation that gives life, love and meaning to who I am and what I can do, with this fearless self awareness."

Keri, 
New York, USA

"Yvette.  Many thanks for a wonderful experience... Our sessions were productive, really interesting adn I so looked forward to them each week with anticipation of what I can learn about myself and my behaviours.  Every session seemed to flow right on topic of what was present in my relaity at the time and your effortless guiding of my strategies never ceased to amaze me.  I highly recommend you as a life coach and thank you again for the experience."

M Shears, 
Melbourne, Australia

"I really questioned my future career ambitions and thanks to Yvette I changed direction from something I felt I had to do, to something I know I will love to do.  I was stuck on this topic for quite some time and Yvette really helped me shed light on this.  I changed the MBA I signed up for and feel excited about my careeer and all the opportunities in the future."

Sabine Mascarenhas, 
Wollongong, Australia